Double P : F That Means : Page Out Of Book

Never understood this one. If you “took a page out of someone’s book”, it’s throw off the plot and would confuse the reader.

If I’m The Captain, I’m Pissed …

I laugh every time I walk down the booze aisle at the store. Is there a bigger scam on the planet? Captain Morgan is throwing millions behind their marketing, and then ol’ Admiral Nelson rolls up, plastic bottle and all, stealing the Cap’s thunder – and his cheaper customers.

An Absolute Nutjob Hero

I know nothing about this guy, but want to know everything about him. Absolute hero. Would love to have this guy out on the road with us a few weeks.

Double P : Great Words : ‘Insecticide’

Hell of a word found at the hardware store or on the side of a truck. “Pesticide” is another gem, but went with INSECTICIDE today.

Best Dance Ever, Worst Delivery Guy Ever

“Blue Streak”. Horribly-awful. Love this scene where he goes undercover as the pizza delivery guy.Still don’t understand why he’s shouting to everyone on the street that he has to feed the police, or how he thought any cheese or toppings were staying on at the 0:56 mark when he turns the boxes sideways and sings, “don’t drop the pizza”.

Also not a good idea to refer to the desk sergeant as ‘Shamu’ either.

Going Off The Grid For A Few Days

No shirt. No shoes. No laptop. Headed south but back online later this week when I get back to work with Coach Wink and Coach Dorris. – PP

Double P : F That Means : Medicine

Another one in the ‘F That Means’ series at, where we joke about sayings that make no sense, cliches and quirky idioms. Today’s installment – how the hell do you give someone a taste of their own medicine?

She Took The Last Train Out Of My Heart …

My guy Tom Kiefer, always running the show in Cinderella. Love this cut, the title track off ‘Heartbreak Station’. Big overblown video that probably cost more than Titanic – the boat, and the movie. Big lap steel solo and grand piano in the middle of a train track. Epic. They don’t make ‘em like this anymore.

PP’s Non-Celebrity Celebrity Tourney

For years I’ve joked with buddies about a Non-Celebrity Celebrity Tournament. Forget the A-listers. Give me the bit part players, heroes in the background or people who stole a random line here or there, like this guy from ‘Weird Science’.

He was in the an early scene in ‘The Kandy Bar’ when Gary and Wyatt were smashed, and showed up later as the bartender for the house party. When bullies Max and Ian tried to act like ballers when ordering a whole bottle of scotch, he told them to bend over and he’d shove it straight up their ass. They both then agreed that on the rocks was fine.

Guys like this will be the backbone of the Pat Perez Non-Celebrity Celebrity Tournament. More sort-of superstars to come …

Double P : F That Means : Any Friend?

We have the ‘Great Words’ series running here at and this off week we want to roll out ‘F That Means’, a series of idioms and other sayings or phrases that absolutely make no sense, starting with, “any friend of yours is a friend of mine”. Where did that start and how does it make any sense?